The Film Bit

Mrs H3 and I have been to the cinema a bit and seen most of the major the new films (except for the Dark Knight which I’ve gone off more and more as I hear more about it. It’s long (as soon as Mark Kermode said its 2 ½ hours and feels like it I knew I wouldn't be watching it unless I really had to), it’s boring (apart from when Heath Ledger is on screen so I’ve been told by just about everyone who’s seen it) and it’s got Christian Bale who personally I can't stand). So here’s a quick rundown on my thoughts on the films we’ve seen.

The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian
So we went to the premiere and it wasn’t exactly the exciting evening we were hoping for. For starters the red (or rather green) carpet seemed to be a bit thin on the ground with stars. Apparently there were ‘celebrities’ but of course as I steadfastly refuse to watch any reality TV or read any of those crappy ‘real-life’ magazines I didn't recognise any of them. This is the reason I look so bemused in the photos. Being serious the only people I actually recognised were Liam Neeson (who was looking divine, as was his wife Natasha Richardson who wore a lovely blue dress) and the four kids (and that was probably only because I’d seen the video of the four of them getting off the boat while we were waiting).

Unfortunately the place we stood wasn’t the best for meeting celebrities either. What seemed like a good position opposite the podium where the TV woman was interviewing the stars as they came through meant they were whisked across to the podium just before they reached us and then continued signing autographs etc. with the crowd just after us. There were a few exceptions. The guy who played Prince Caspian – Ben Barnes (who is to play Dorian Gray in a new version of the film – one definitely on my list to see), made the effort to come back to see our section and a large screaming group of young girls next to my left ear attracted several children’s TV presenters and reality TV boys. Liam Neeson never came near although we waited for over an hour for him to reach us, although to be fair the four or five of us who wanted to meet him (strangely we were all older women) weren’t able to shout loud enough over the little girls crying for the latest reality TV star.



By the time the ‘stars’ had gone in it was well past time that the film should have started which wasn’t really fair considering it was a school night and there were lots of children there. We had to get to our seats and didn’t even have time to get a drink, let alone anything to eat. So we found our seats. The showing was at the O2 and seated 10,000 people. Imagine a cinema screen in a space that huge. We had and expecting problems seeing from further back had got seats about 3 rows from the front. However, the screen was huge, far bigger than expected and we could have easily seen it from everywhere. So we were further forward than I’d have liked, although it was good for seeing the film’s stars when they appeared on stage just before the showing. It was also a bit freaky when you turned round to realise there were almost 10,000 people behind you and very strange when sections of the audience suddenly burst out in sporadic applause and the like.

The film itself was good enough: certainly on a par with the previous title in the series with excellent cinematography and CGI. However, it was shot in New Zealand and there were several scenes where it was too similar to the Lord of the Rings, both in content and the use of the same spot for filming (an example of this is when the Telmarine’s chase Caspian from the castle they are washed away while trying to cross the river, the same stretch of water that washed away the Nazgul in Fellowship of the Ring when they were chasing Arwen and Frodo). Similarly when the Narnian’s attacked the Telmarine castle there was a definite feel of Harry Potter to it, from the aerial views of the castle to the flying griffin.

One major redeeming feature for me was the brilliant casting of King Miraz by Sergio Castellitto who I had never heard of before. He was very much the perfect baddie and I spent the whole film alternately thinking that I was in love and thinking how perfect he would be as Severus Snape. Not replacing my beloved Alan obviously, but for his vital younger years scenes in the Deathly Hallows (surely they must do the Prince’s Tale justice if they’re splitting the film into two parts mustn't they? By rights it should be a huge part of the films and I live in hope that eventually they’ll give him the prominence that he deserves). Sergio has the dark glittering eyes, the sallow skin and the prominent nose and just the right amount of snark to carry it off successfully.

So here’s a picture of him … tell me he isn’t perfect as a younger Severus.

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
Well you know I was looking forward to seeing this, after all I LOVE the first three films (yep even the dodgy second one) and although the reviews were dire I was still expecting great things. WRONG! The film was every bit as bad as the reviews said, in fact, if anything I’d have said it was worse. Overlong, boring and completely out to lunch (there was NO need for aliens in this film – Indy is a treasure hunter and we want to see that). It didn't help that Harrison’s performance reminded me heavily of the ‘Headcases’ TV show’s version of Indiana Jones. So much so that it really put me off. I came out of the film convinced that I would never watch it again, not even when it’s on the telly and I think Mrs H3 was pretty much in agreement with me on this. Certainly we were both hugely disappointed and felt that the series had been badly let down by this pile of crap.

Mamma Mia
I saw the stage show of this last year with the girls and absolutely loved it and when I saw the first teaser trailer towards the end of last year I was excited about the film version. An interesting choice of cast and the chance for an expansion on the magical stage show made this a must-see film for me.

Unfortunately I would have to confess to being a little disappointed. Although Meryl Streep and Julie Walters put in excellent performances and Colin Firth was lovely enough to look at as always, it seemed to me that putting the real scenery behind the set pieces somehow dampened the effect. The minimal staging in the show is just that for a reason. Imagining the scenery allows the performance to shine through, with all the scenery around to take your mind off the performance it comes across as lacklustre. It did have me pining for my Crete holiday but apart from that I wasn’t impressed although Pierce Brosnan’s singing performance was terrible enough to almost make it compulsive viewing.

I know that most of the people I went with enjoyed it thoroughly, although Mrs H3 did tell me just as the film was starting that she wasn’t an Abba fan, something that I think you really need to be. I couldn't imagine even seeing the film if I didn't like the music. Steve and the barmaids went to see it the following week and they loved it, even getting up and singing and dancing (we were far more restrained and stayed seated through the whole thing which might have been where we went wrong), except for Tammie – she fell asleep, citing the film as boring when asked. Personally I’d agree with Tammie.

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor
Now I was looking forward to this almost as much as Indiana Jones. Yet again I have a deep love of the first two Mummy films (although my sister hates them and can't understand my interest at all) and was looking forward to the latest in the series even if it was no longer set in Egypt.

To say I was disappointed would be an understatement. Disappointment doesn’t cover how grieviously this franchise has been damaged by this terrible film. For me the first major and completely unforgivable problem was the casting of someone else as Evie and someone who was nowhere near up to the role. Okay so Rachel Weisz didn’t want to be in it (and I’m not surprised considering how crap it was) but instead of getting someone completely different with a totally different acting style and personality to play the character they should have killed her off. Brendan Fraser is of course always pretty wooden but you expect that and so he doesn't disappoint, but the actor who played the son seemed too old to be such; he was more like a younger brother. Even John Hannah’s performance (always usually a highlight in these films) was marred by rubbish jokes and the dialogue all the way through completely stank.

There were some good set pieces, clever special effects and of course martial arts, after all Jet Li and Michelle Yeoh were in there too, but it wasn’t enough to redeem what was an absolute stinker of a film. When the thing you worry about most is whether the yak was okay it tells you something is seriously wrong. As it finished Mrs H3 and I agreed that we would never go to see another Mummy film again and also decided that ‘Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull’ was actually a better film! I think that says it all really.

The X Files – I Want to Believe
Well I didn't have the highest hopes for this as I’d heard reviews saying it was basically an extra long episode of the TV series. This was absolutely correct it really was, and not one of their more interesting episodes either. Having said that it meant I got to spend the best part of 2 hours in the company of David Duchovny so it wasn’t all bad (although I was pleased when he shaved off his beard). And I do have to give 10 out of 10 to Mrs H3 for coming up with a much better plot ending for the film than was actually the case! This is definitely the best of the films we’ve seen recently. although I’m hoping Hellboy 2 is going to be a step up, so far all the films I’ve been looking forward to for the Summer season have been disappointing (to say the least).

Of course there are films I am looking forward to, although not a huge amount it has to be said. Having said that the end part of the year has the films I’m REALLY excited about. Coming next is ‘Hellboy 2: The Golden Army’ as I mentioned above. I will admit that I wasn’t that keen on the original Hellboy film for reasons I can't quite put my finger on. For me it just wasn’t quite enough. However, it looks like Guillermo del Toro has gone to town with the monsters in this one, very much more ‘Pan’s Labyrinth’ (which I absolutely adored) so I’m looking forward to it. The trailer looks awesome and of course it’s got Luke Goss in it, looking like an ill Lucius Malfoy so it’s almost worth watching for that alone.

I’m also now champing at the bit about ‘Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince’ since Warner Brothers have FINALLY released the teaser trailer for it (all 1 minute and 31 seconds of it – see below). Of course the theatrical trailer would be better and is desperately awaited (and not just by me either – I think the whole HP fandom is going mad with the lack of promotion), but it hasn't been released with The Mummy as was reported all over the internet (shame because it would have almost made The Mummy worth going to see). Other rumours suggest it will be shown with the new Star Wars film, but I have no intention of seeing that even for the HP trailer.



The HBP premiere has been chosen as this years Royal Film Performance. Amazingly the tickets are on sale to the public, although at £4,800 for 2 tickets (only a mere £7,000 for 4) for entrance to the main film theatre with the chosen royals plus other assorted famous people (Alan Rickman and Jason Isaacs? *sigh*) I don't think we’ll be attending unless Mrs H3 or I win the lottery in the near future. There are other tickets on sale at varying prices, a red carpet event with screening at an ‘adjoining cinema’ for £200 per person, or a smaller screen ‘adjoining cinema’ for £175. There is also a ‘Near Simultaneous Screening’ which takes place an hour later for £60 and a ‘Late Night Screening’ at £25.

Now I’m seriously considering the last option as it’s 1) the cheapest and 2) directly after the Royal premiere. I REALLY (and I do mean really) want to be among the thousands watching the stars of the film turn up on the red carpet just so I can be in close proximity to the lovely Mr Rickman. However, if there’s one thing I’ve learnt from the Prince Caspian premiere, there is nothing worse than watching the red carpet and then not having time to eat or even get a drink. So the late night showing makes a great deal of sense. I get to squee in a fangirly way at Alan (and Jason if he’s there) and then get to chow down before heading off to see the film. Worth £25 of anyone’s money to do that I’m thinking.

Finally the last film I am waiting for, almost as much as HBP is the teen vampire romance flick ‘Twilight’. I am avidly watching the two teaser trailers that have been released, plus any extra scenes that come along and can’t wait for more footage. It stars the gorgeous looking Robert Pattinson (who played Cedric Diggory in ‘Goblet of Fire’ and ‘Order of the Phoenix’) as Edward Cullen and there has been considerable discussion in the Twilight fandom about his suitability for the role. Well he looks pretty damn good to me (and no Mrs H3 I don't care at all that he’s too young for me I still think he’s completely gorgeous).



I have to admit to only having found the books since hearing about the film, but I love a good vampire story (oh okay I just love any vampire stories; good, bad and indifferent) and the ‘Twilight’ series are very good vampire stories and I would definitely recommend reading them. Surely it is impossible not to fall in love with Edward Cullen in the way that it was impossible not to fall in love with Louis in the Anne Rice books (or maybe I am just a shameless romantic), although it is even easier as he is every teenage girl’s dream man even if he is undead. And then there’s Jacob!



Once I’d got the books I’d read the first three, ‘Twilight’, ‘New Moon’ and ‘Eclipse’ within two weeks (and these are big 600 page books). ‘Breaking Dawn’ the last book in the series was released last week, apparently causing a huge backlash from the fandom because … well I didn't buy the book because I wanted to wait for the paperback, but I’m not sure I can wait that long – avoiding ‘Breaking Dawn’ spoilers is becoming more and more difficult and I really want to read the story before I hear about the ending and of course to find out what’s got everyone so upset.